The heart of things.

You must understand this, my dear brothers. Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.
James 1:19

Humility comes at times when you least expect it. I know for myself, it took a long while to learn this lesson. I’ve always been a stubborn individual. I never liked to be wrong or even, gosh, admit it. In the past, it was easier to write off situations and or avoid them to not have to face the truth that I maybe, just maybe, I’m not always right.

The reality was deep down it was my pride and self-serving ego that lead to many unforeseen outcomes that could have been avoided. I let my need to always been “right” or have the last word control and change relationships that meant the world to me. Realizing the words you say, the way you act, actually pretty much just about everything you do to be right not only hurts the ones you love but yourself as well.

Let me tell you. The realization that you’re not always right isn’t pretty. Literally, it blind sides you on an unexpected Tuesday afternoon when all your worried about is getting through the work day. And the funny thing is, the way that it presents itself is never in the way you would have ever envisioned it being brought to your attention.

Who would have thought it would be regular at my job that I occasionally made small talk with about random topics, football, family, and fun life stories to be the one to point it out. And he said it in the most kind, caring and joking way, “Honey, you are smart girl but no offense, have you ever noticed that maybe you’re the problem.” It caught me off guard and I just smiled and laughed a little. Normally, I would have been completely offended if someone else said something that was so abrupt. I would have said some smart ass comment or blew it off as they didn’t know what they were talking about. But those words he said stuck with me.

It gave me a lot to think about in the days following in just the way that I talk, think and react to circumstances. He was right though. Being right all the time really hadn’t gotten me anywhere but just to the places I didn’t want to be. It literally forced me to look at my own heart and re-evaluate myself.

Being brought to a place of recognizing humbleness isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Making the decision to change was hard and still is a challenge especially when it comes to breaking such a bad habit. Now, it’s been close to two years to that date and I’m even more thankful for that patient’s honesty amidst our small talk. Without his truthful comment, I know I wouldn’t have come this far.

Denature. Primers. Extension.

By this point in my life, I imagined I would be farther in my career. But here I sit again in Purdue’s library….STUDYING. 

After graduating from college in 2012 with my degree in Nutrition and Fitness, I thought I had all the time in the world to make myself into who I wanted to be (at least career wise). I took a year off school and worked in the medical field assisting physicians in the Dermatology field. Some days, I really loved my job. I got to finally have that patient interaction that I wanted and maybe gain some clinical experience to help me along in the future. However I knew at the end of the day, I still wanted to pursue my first real career interest, Nursing.

A year ago, I applied for Nursing school with high hopes that my career could finally be where I wanted. Sadly, my hopes were slightly crushed when I was told I needed to retake my science classes because they were no longer current (nursing standards- 5 years). So I re-entered college and basically started over. I knew that this was something that I really wanted and if it was just 3 classes holding me back, I was willing to muster through the next year fulfilling those requirements. A year came and passed. I passed all three classes with good grades and re-applied for nursing school.

Late April, I received a large envelope in the mail from the school of Nursing bearing both good and bad news. The good news was that I was in good standing with the school of Nursing and was looked highly as a possible applicant. The bad news, that due to an overwhelming demand in the school, I was put on a wait list and will be contacted once a spot became available for me. I was devastated. How could something I wanted so much be so hard to obtain. The summer passed and no good news from the school came. I decided that I would not let these short comings stop me. I still had one more semester of classes that I wanted to take and one class that was a prerequisite to nursing school, microbiology.

And that’s what brings me to Purdue’s library today. I’m studying microbiology. But for the first time after this ordeal with the school of nursing, I am looking at other options if things still don’t go as planned. Graduate school has crossed my mind. Maybe PA school. Maybe a Masters in Biology.

I know I’m a smart cookie. I know that I can succeed if I try. Sometimes things don’t always go as planned. And I’ve learned to say…

“That’s okay. Something better is ahead.”

Social Peer Pressure

So here starts my first post to a blog “in the making.” Over the years, I’ve been told by several people that I should begin a blog and share all the many things my life entails. After years of consideration, I’ve given into the social peer pressure….

So here goes nothing and break a leg, I suppose.